About ten years ago I was diagnosed with acid reflux.
To diagnose me a doctor put a tube with a camera down my throat and looked in my stomach. He said I had a hiatel hernia, which commonly happens in pregnant women and individuals over sixty and contributes to acid reflux. No one knows why people have acid reflux, but over the years, I've learned how to cope with this chronic condition.
1. Find your trigger foods. It's easy to do. Think of everything that you like that tastes good: coffee, soda, chocolate, cookies, desserts, pasta with tomato sauce, onions. Don't eat any of them.
2. Drink water. Become a connoisseur of water. Get to know Fuji, Essentia, Icelandic Glacial. Find which has the best pH balance. This is the most fun you'll have in your life now.
3. Do you like carrots? I hope so because this is pretty much all you can eat.
4. Learn to say, No, thank you. No, you can't have that food.
5. Always carry powerful drugs. I like Gaviscon Extra Strength. It's like a big blanket for the contents of my stomach smothering all the food and acid before it goes back up.
6. Try not to get stressed. Stress can cause acid reflux. But I'm stressed because I have acid reflux. Yeah, deep, man.
7. Meditate. It will help you not think about all the food you're not eating.
8. Explain to your friends. Sorry, I can't do this shot because acid will consequently destroy my esophagus and throat. They won't understand. They are drunk.
9. Persevere. Sometimes that coffee or tomato sauce will be hard to not eat. I get it. But before you consume picture the searing pain you will likely experience, the bubbly acid burning your throat and tongue.
10. Have some more carrots. So tasty!